foreign in my own country

The TCK Patriot

Posted on May 20, 2013 by Expat Alien

Fourth of July, Nigeria Style

Growing up as a Third Culture Kid, I never really identified with my home country. I celebrated the holidays of my host country or my school’s country. I grew up in Mexico City and went to a British school. I celebrated the Queen’s Birthday, and Mexico’s Independence day on the 16th of September, and of course the Day of the Dead. I didn’t feel nationalistic about anyplace but was happy to celebrate with everybody. I don’t ever remember celebrating the 4th of July although I do remember dressing up on Halloween a few times. I just didn’t have anything to identify with. I knew very little of US history and even less of its culture.
When I went to live in the US after high school, I was in for a rude awakening and had severe reverse culture shock. It wasn’t until my Junior year in college that I started to learn about the USA. I was living in Boston and a friend took me under wing and taught me about the history of the area and the people who lived there. For the first time I started to feel something for my home country.

The longer I stayed in my home country the more comfortable I became. As I moved from state to state I leaned new things about its diversity. I learned about the holidays and what they stood for. And I learned to criticize what I didn’t like about it.

I continued to travel outside the country with a slightly new perspective. I started to compare other countries to my own and see what the differences and similarities were. I started to appreciate things. I saw that compared to many countries, women in the US were much better off. I learned how important freedom of speech really was. Although this country had a lot of problems and I didn’t always agree with what our government did, I always had the right to express my dissatisfaction openly.

As I grew older, when living overseas, I could be very critical of the US and their foreign policy and many of their actions. But when Fourth of July came around, I always cried overcome by emotion when I heard the Star Spangled Banner.

Kind of strange how that all turned out.

Food Friday: Banana Bread

Posted on May 16, 2013 by Expat Alien

Banana Bread

½ cup shortening (butter)

1 cup sugar

Cream shortening and sugar

Add 2 eggs

Combine and stir in:

2 cups flour

1 tsp soda

pinch of salt

Fold in:

3 very ripe bananas, mashed

Pour into greased loaf pan

Bake at 350 degrees F for 45 minutes to 1 hr.

The Question of “Home”

Posted on May 14, 2013 by Expat Alien

Re-posting this, just because….

The eternal TCK** question – Where is “home”?

Dictionary.com tells us the following

home [hohm]

noun

1. a house, apartment, or other shelter that is the usual residence of a person, family, or household.

2. the place in which one’s domestic affections are centered.

3. an institution for the homeless, sick, etc.: a nursing home.

4. the dwelling place or retreat of an animal.

5. the place or region where something is native or most common.

Synonyms

1. abode, dwelling, habitation; domicile. See house.

2. hearth, fireside.

3. asylum.

For Third Culture Kids or Global Nomads, it is an ongoing topic. The eternal question – where are you from? Where is your home? These are not easy questions to answer. Home is here and everywhere. I am from here and everywhere.

That very last word is my favorite. Asylum. The place where you feel safe. That is where home is. That is where home should be. What makes you feel safe? People you trust. People who love you. Mutual understanding and respect. Comfort. Growing up, my home was always where my family was, unless I was with them, and then it was wherever we were. It didn’t matter if it was a hotel room or a house or an airport. As long as we were together and had a pack of cards nearby, we were at home. A good card game could get us through anything. Some of my fondest memories are of blackouts during torrential rainstorms playing cards by candlelight.

We all continue to search for the elusive “home” but I think we know where to find it when we really need it.

“The strength of this family bond works to the benefit of children when parent-child communication is good and the overall family dynamic is healthy. It can be devastating when it is not. Compared to the geographically stable child, the global-nomad child is inordinately reliant on the nuclear family for affirmation, behavior-modeling, support and above all, a place of safety. The impact, therefore, of dysfunction in this most basic of units in exacerbated by the mobile lifestyle.”

Excerpt from GROWING UP WITH A WORLD VIEW By Norma M. McCaig

**TCK’s are people who lived outside their passport country as a child

Food Friday: Cauliflower Pie with Potato Crust

Posted on May 9, 2013 by Expat Alien

Cauliflower Pie

Potato Crust

2 cups grated raw potato

½ tsp salt

¼ of an onion, grated

Mix well, let stand a few minutes, then squeeze out as much liquid as you can.

Mix in:

1 egg beaten

Oil a pie plate and pat potato mixture into the dish making sure it goes all the way up the sides.

Heat oven to 400 degrees F. Bake 30-40 minutes until browned

Turn down oven to 375 degrees.

Filling

1 med cauliflower broken into small pieces

Sauté for 5 minutes:

3 tbsp butter

1 clove crushed garlic

1 cup chopped onion

dash thyme

½ tsp basil

½ tsp salt

Add the cauliflower

Cook, covered for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally

Combine:

2 eggs

¼ cup milk

black pepper

Grate enough cheddar cheese to make 1 cup

Assemble:

Spread half the cheese into baked crust, then the sauté mixture, then the rest of the cheese. Pour custard over the top.

Bake 35-40 minutes at 375 degrees.

Voila!

Expat Book Review

Posted on May 5, 2013 by Expat Alien

Here We Are and There We Go by Jill Dobbe

Jill and her husband were school teachers in Wisconsin USA when one day they moved half way around the world and their lives changed drastically.

Like Jill’s children, I was born into the nomadic life of the serial expat. I lived in West Africa, Mexico, Asia, South America, and Europe, so I can identify with many of her experiences. I grew up speaking different languages, like her children did, and I continue to have the travel bug today. Like her children do.

What truly amazed me about this book was that they just jumped headlong into it with no safety net and blinders off. They made the decision to move to Guam almost on a whim. They didn’t even know where Guam was. That was either very gutsy or completely crazy. And what was even more interesting was that they stuck it out, learned, and grew through it all.

It didn’t sound like Guam was the dream South Pacific location we all imagined. It actually sounded pretty challenging. But they worked through it and learned a lot. That made their next posting to Singapore a bit easier. Of course Singapore was probably not a hardship posting. But they were still half way around the world from family and friends in a place with a different culture. They seemed to breeze through that one.

By the time the got to Ghana they were seasoned travelers. Although, having lived in Nigeria myself, I know that Ghana was probably not paradise either. But as they came to understand, there are wonderful things all over the world. You just have to be open to them. Jill and her family discovered the joy, frustration, sorrow, and unending surprises one finds when traveling.

I might be reading something into this but it seemed to me they decided to return to the USA for the sake of the children. Their children spent their high school years (or most of them) in the USA learning to be US citizens. This probably made it a much easier transition for them in the long run. It might have given them a clear identity at a young age. However, from my experience, it doesn’t work. My son returned to the USA when he was six and now that he is about to enter college all he dreams about is going overseas. And it seems their children were the same. They were happy to continue traveling.

Returning to the USA was a difficult transition for all of them. Jill says she realized people were not interested in her stories and could not relate. I know exactly what she means. It is so far from what people know, it is difficult to imagine and therefore not interesting. Re-entry is a challenge for all expats but travelers know how to adjust and tweak and adapt. Jill and her family were no exception. They had a good few years back home with friends and family but the itch was still there.

At the end of the book they leave the USA again for distant lands and new experiences. I think Jill has more to tell. Perhaps she will write part two some day!

Check it out, it is worth the read!!

Madison Capital

Posted on May 4, 2013 by Expat Alien

I visited Madison, Wisconsin recently. It is the capital of Wisconsin and has a capital building housing both chambers of the Wisconsin legislature as well as the Wisconsin Supreme Court and the Governor’s office. It was recently the site of a major demonstration against the Governor that ultimately led to the people of Wisconsin voting on the repeal of the Governor. He was not repealed.

The building itself was completed in 1917. The architect was George Post of New York and it cost $7.25 million to build. It is 284 ft, 5 in. to the top of the dome, three feet shorter than the capital building in Washington, DC.

The white granite on the outside is from Vermont and makes the dome the only granite dome in the United States. It is the also the largest dome by volume in the United States and one of the largest in the world. Inside the rotunda there is marble from Greece, Algeria, Italy and France; limestone from Minnesota; red granite from Wisconsin.

It was designated a National Historic Landmark in 2001

Food Friday: Baked Asparagus

Posted on May 2, 2013 by Expat Alien

Baked Asparagus

1 lb asparagus

2 tbsp olive oil

2 tbsp lemon juice

2 cloves garlic, chopped

2 tbsp parmesan, grated or shredded

1 tsp salt

Cut the asparagus into about 1 inch pieces.

Toss with all ingredients

Put into oven-proof dish

Cook at 400 degrees F for about 12 minutes

I like it with salmon.

For the salmon I marinate it in oil, soy sauce, garlic, lemon juice, and a little ginger. Then throw it in a very hot pan or on the grill.

Sari for Baby

Posted on April 27, 2013 by Expat Alien

Several years ago my niece married into a Bengali family. She had a traditional Hindu wedding ceremony in the USA. This of course, could not have taken place without her family, including her sister with blue hair and Freitag bag.

She and her new husband and all the parents left for India a few months after her wedding and spent a month meeting all the relatives in India. She even had another ceremony over there.

She embraced her new family and their traditions. She was curious to learn all about them and incorporate their beliefs and rituals into her life.

Annaprashan is the Hindu ceremony celebrating a baby’s first solid food. It is also known as the Rice Eating Ceremony as baby’s first food is usually rice. The ceremony takes place when the baby is about 6 months. For girls it takes place in odd months – the 5^th or 7^th, while for boys it is even months the 6^th or 8^th.

The child is very dressed up reminiscent of a bride or groom. It is not only about the food but also serves as an introduction to society. Friends and relatives are invited to join in the celebration. A game is usually played after the ceremony where certain symbolic items are laid out in front of the child. Books symbolize learning; jewels symbolize wealth, a pen symbolizes wisdom, clay symbolizes property, and food symbolizing a love for food. The first item the child reaches for indicates their future.

Baby with her uncle at Rice Eating Ceremony

My niece rented a hall for her baby’s Annaprashan. They invited all their friends and relatives. She wanted to wear traditional clothing and she wanted her baby to also wear a beautiful sari. Living in the middle of the USA, it was difficult for her to find a sari for her baby so she made one herself.

That got her thinking. If she had so much trouble finding something beautiful for her child to wear to the ceremony, other people might have the same problem. There is a large Indian community in this country. Wouldn’t there be a market for baby saris?

My great niece

Well, she is about to find out. She just launched her Sari Baby website. My great niece is the very cute model for these beautiful silk saris.

Check it out!

Food Friday: Spinach Lasagna

Posted on April 25, 2013 by Expat Alien

Last week I was in a hurry after work and decided to make a quick and easy spinach lasagna. Unfortunately, I got distracted and ended up overcooking it so my final product was not that great. I hope you pay attention and do a better job!!

Spinach Lasagna

6 oz fresh spinach, chopped

2 eggs

1 lb ricotta cheese

8 oz mozzarella cheese, shredded or sliced

25 oz tomato sauce

3/4 cup parmesan, grated or shredded

1/2 pound lasagna noodles (I use the kind you don’t have to cook first. If you have to cook it, then cook it first.)

Combine the ricotta and the eggs. Throw in some black pepper to taste.

Take a 9X13 glass baking dish. Lightly cover the bottom with tomato sauce. Cover with noodles.

Pour the ricotta mixture on top and cover with spinach.

Put another layer of noodles on top.

Cover with tomato sauce and the Mozzarella cheese.

Put another layer of noodles with remaining tomato sauce on top.

Sprinkle parmesan on top.

Bake in 350 degree F oven for about 45 minutes. It should be just brown and bubbly.

70 years together

Posted on April 23, 2013 by Expat Alien

I am re-posting this from my other blog – Eclectic Global Nomad.

My parents were married at 2:00 in the afternoon. My father was on medical leave from the US Navy after having his appendix out. The year was 1943.

My mother remembers driving with her father to the church. They lived in a small town in Iowa. As they drove through downtown my mother noticed the bank clock said 1:55. When she and her new husband drove back the same route to her house for a small reception, she again noticed the clock. It now said 2:15. The minister had married them under the wrong name. Nobody mentioned it.

My father’s father ran the family farm so he had petrol coupons. He filled the car with gas and gave them coupons so they could go to Kansas City for a two day honeymoon before my father returned to his post at Lakehurst, New Jersey. He was training to fly blimps. My mother was teaching school and had to finish out the year before joining him.

They were separated again when my father went to fly blimps off the coast of Brazil searching for German submarines. He remembers Christmas Day, 1944. He and his buddies drove through the Brazilian countryside on their way to find a beach to play volleyball. It was the first time he had ever seen that kind of poverty. He noticed the crops in the fields and decided that very day he could help people by teaching agriculture.

He had planned to be a vocational agriculture instructor when he returned to civilian life but this gave it a whole new dimension. He wanted to work overseas. His mother had always told him he could do what ever he wanted if he set his mind to it.

Continue Reading

foreign in my own country

Re-posting this, just because….

Here We Are and There We Go by Jill Dobbe

Follow “Expat Alien”